Two years ago today, I stood at the edge of a brand-new chapter, holding onto hope, dreams, and a vision of what marriage would be like. I had no idea how much life, motherhood, healing, and hard days would shape those dreams into something deeper—something real.

I didn’t walk into marriage expecting it to be easy, but I also didn’t expect the weight we’d carry so soon. Between raising babies, battling health issues, healing from trauma, and figuring out who we are as individuals, our marriage has had to grow up fast.

There have been beautiful moments—quiet mornings with coffee, belly laughs over inside jokes, the sound of our kids giggling down the hall. And there have been hard ones—nights spent apart, words we wish we could take back, silence that said more than yelling ever could.

What I’ve Learned After Two Years:

1. Expectations can be heavy. Grace is lighter.

I had to let go of the picture-perfect marriage I thought I needed. Real love isn’t found in filtered highlight reels—it’s built in the hard conversations, the forgiveness, and the choice to show up when it would be easier to walk away.

2. Marriage is not the cure for loneliness.

Healing deep wounds doesn’t come through a spouse. I’ve had to walk through the hard work of therapy, faith, and facing the parts of myself I’d rather ignore. Some days I show up for marriage counseling; other days I cancel. Sometimes we start sessions with hope and don’t follow through on the hard work that comes after. It’s messy, but it’s real.

3. We say God is the foundation—but then we act like we know better.

We’ve tried to invite God into our marriage, but the truth is, we’ve also pushed Him out when we wanted control. When we thought we could fix things on our own. When pride, stubbornness, and exhaustion got in the way. And still—He’s been there. Patient. Present. Waiting for us to turn back and build something real with Him at the center.

4. It’s okay to not be okay.

There’s this pressure to make anniversaries sound like fairy tales. But the truth is—we’re still figuring things out. We’ve been in survival mode more than I care to admit. But even in that, we’re learning how to honor the commitment without pretending everything is perfect.

5. Love isn’t always loud.

Sometimes love is quiet. It’s a text that says “I’m praying for you” even after a hard day. It’s staying in the room when walking out would be easier. It’s one more attempt at grace, even after you’ve already given what feels like too much.

Two Years In

So here we are—two years in. Not where I thought we’d be, but still here. Still trying. Still asking God to help us soften our hearts. Still trying to pick up the pieces when everything feels too heavy.

If you’re in a season like this—where love feels like survival, faith feels distant, and healing feels hard—I see you. You’re not alone. Your story is still being written, and God hasn’t walked away from it.

Maybe that’s the most honest way to mark this anniversary—not with perfection, but with presence. Not with flawless vows, but with faith that even messy, half-finished stories can still be redeemed.

A successful marriage isn’t about perfection—it’s about persistence, grace, and choosing love even when it’s hard.

Now I want to hear from you:

How long have you been married? What’s one lesson you’ve learned that helps keep your marriage strong? Drop it below—I’d love to see real wisdom from real people.